Sum Up the Faction...In Haiku!

[amphoterik]

So, I got this idea from the "Sum up the factions in 10 words or less" thread. Let's hear you're faction summary Haiku's! Remember, I Haiku is 5/7/5 syllables.

Legion: We are in your base / We flew right over your walls / Eating your leaders

[Mod_Faultie]

Mercenaries
I make all my coin,
Fill my pockets with treasure,
By killing your mans.

[blakeh1]

they are all fodder
go ahead kill my army
I can still win it

[tonyzahn]

Khador:
There is nothing else
To match the insanity
of the red Butcher

Legion:
Yeah, we are squishy
but it doesn't matter much
if we hit you first

[Teleologica]

Yeah, we are squishy
but it doesn't matter much
if we hit you first

:)



Circle:

Our trees are not the
nice kind. You can hug them, but
they will hug you back.

[Gx1080]

Cygnar:
Power of lightning
The suckers should not bring knives
to our shooting field.

[CrimsonGuard]

Feel the Phantom Bolt
Watch it pierce your weak defence
You thought you were safe..

[mangustheix]

Blindwater congregation
Us gators eat you
Your hearts power our blood rage
They taste so yummy

[CrimsonGuard]

I know I'm a nerd
Writing haiku's during work
I feel so silly

[John Q.]

Skorne:

torturing our beasts
to make them hit you harder
we are so pokey

[relasine]

the buff fest completed
karn charges in to attack
okay so now what

[amphoterik]

I made a Haiku
For you, so you would know that
Legion is awesome

Trolls:
Just big dudes with swords
Not too bad, wait whats that noise
oh no! borrowers!

[amphoterik]

OK, Hard mode, you can;t use your fingers to count syllables :Undead:

[simon sez]

Fiend!
Cryx

Soon you will join us

In death to serve Lord Toruk

The Dragonfather

[henderslice]

Legion (particularly Thagrosh)

Bethayne. Shared athanc,
Everblight reminded me,
Pimpin' ain't easy.

[raimius]

OK, Hard mode, you can;t use your fingers to count syllables :Undead:

burning with the hate
about your damn restrictions
behold my finger!


I've heard that real haikus include something about the seasons, so with that in mind, on to Cryx.

the winter of man
for the dragon father comes
eons of planning


Circle Orboros:

all life feeds on life
as the spring chases winter
inevitable

Khador:

foolish to anger
the sleeping bear in winter
great rage will follow


Those are the forces I play. =)

[Baffler]

Retribution:

You're killing our Gods,
that makes us pretty angry,
so we must kill you.

[MagnustheJust]

Mercs
wandering warrior
for ideals or lust for coin
home where you slumber

Skorne
ancestral fury
fueling conquest of rage
subjugate all foes

Blindwater
silently watching
foolish offenders trespass
warning omens ignored


and no fingers used
to count out the syllables
writing these haiku

[Space_Thor]

Retribution:
I'll just hide here by
the forest that blocks his sight
oh @#$% a phoenix

[princessprettyposies]

Really hate haikus
I think they are stupid
wish they would stop now

:-)

[tonyzahn]

Really hate haikus
I think they are stupid
wish they would stop now

:-)
What are you saying?
Creating haikus is quite fun
that's why you wrote one

[themocaw]

Angry Terrorist Elves. . .
Wait, is that six syllables?
Or only five? Damn. . .

[Demeritus]

Retribution:
Our gods are dying
Hunters of Mage, Lords of Dawn
Quick and Hard we strike

Protectorate
In Menoths name, fight
Through song and prayer, we will win
To burn and deny

[Amarel]

The Cygnar gun line
Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom
Thank you Blackadder

[SoulReclaimer]

Khador:

If size does matter
We are the largest around
Nothing but Heavies!


Legion:
Knockdown what is that
These wings are not for eating
We assassinate!

[Sevwall]

Cygnar:
Our people, attacked
Honorable men will fight
One, two, three bullets

Khador:
The mighty people
Khadric blood makes axes strong
Flee before us, pigs

Menoth:
Purifying flame
What hope do the godless have
We are the destined

Cryx:
I wait, life leaves you
Time betrays you in the end
One day, all is ours

Retribution:
my retribution
a goddess lays close to death
you are very close too

Mercs:
Today I fight him
Ah, a large sum of money
Tomorrow I don't

Trolls:
Women in lament
Enemies flee before you
Signs of a good fight

Skorne:
It hurts, I don't care
One day I will be sand, dust
Kill those who oppose

Circle:
I'm the one in charge
behind the curtains, plotting
one day I will win

Legion:
I want the shiny
I own you, get the shiny
Shiny makes me strong

Minions:
I'm no animal
I possess motivations
mostly my hunger

[RocketSurgeon]

Blindwater:
This here' the bayou
Y'all c'mon have a sit down
Right therr in the pot

Khador:
I made an axe-hat
Here! Try it on little man
Why are you fall down?

[Gx1080]

Menoth:

Together we sing
"Through the Fire and Flames"
Suck it, Dragonforce

[Wolfbiter]

Menoth

Menoth is the boss
If you do not accept this
We will smite and burn

[Oilslick]

Menoth is our god
We are His righteous servants
Killing in His name

[EpicAstinos]

Skorne:

torturing our beasts
to make them hit you harder
we are so pokey
Oh god I just can't stop laughing! This may be worth tattooing.

OOOOOOR

The laughter it comes
bubbling up far too strong
I need a tattoo.

[Mnkylord]

Skorne:
There's sand in my shorts
As I tread through the Marches
In lovely armor

[Mnkylord]

Skorne:
Exalted, I slept
Then Zaal wanted a Kovass
That f****** a**hole

[Defenstrator]

Cygnar

POW 12s kill casters
Unfortunately we have
far too many POW 10s

[thesavage]

Cygnar

Snap, crackle, KABOOM!
We have guns and lightning swords,
Oh, and Triumph too.

Protectorate

No, no, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
No, Uh-uh, no no.

[EpicAstinos]

It is said Legion
Needs no sprays, flight, eyeless sight.
Inconceivable.

[Kaptajn Congoboy]

The shaper of Man
Honor him as is his due
Or burn to black ash

Across the red waste
Coming with steel, beast and lash
Soon all is in chains

[PPS_Jen]

Forum denizens
Showing creativity
Makes me laugh out loud

[Ulf]

Cryx:

Night's curtain sweeps low,
too late, dreams whisper warnings
as the blood tides rise.

[alchahest]

A Carnivean
it cares not for the seasons
Pow 18 Bitings

[Dino-Czar]

White clouds, deep blue sky.
On a distant hill, a man.
Lightning strikes at will.

[amphoterik]

roses might be red,
violets might be blue, Legion
will eat your children

[CrimsonGuard]

Oh god my head hurts
Not really surprising though
I got axed to face

[Walter]

Nightmare is a jack
That can get ghostly and prey
and kill your caster

[Loveless]

Now repent and die.
You brought your soldiers' bodies;
We have brought the flame.

---

Ignore your old gods
And remember to look on
The blight side of life

[fastlane]

From faith comes power
Menoth smites my enemies
bow, heathen, or burn.

[skrob]

Oh no, the Orgoth!
Many years of slavery.
Giant robot time.

[Gx1080]

Khador:

You should be afraid
because in Soviet Khador
The Butcher charges YOU! ROAR!

[KainMalice]

Why do we need more of this nonsense? Is our community really THAT starved for news of anything, that we have now resorted to this? Seriously...

[Dino-Czar]

Why do we need more of this nonsense? Is our community really THAT starved for news of anything, that we have now resorted to this? Seriously...

Who peed in your milk?
We are having fun with words.
Go be somewhere else.

[Ravir]

Trolls
My axe in your mouth
Dhunia strengthens the kin
This beer tastes funny

[petetsm]

Khador

Land of ice and snow
Where only the strong survive
With axe to the face!

or...

Our armor is hard
Our axes are sharp and bloody
For the Motherland!

[henderslice]

Dragonspawn charges
Carnivean bite and claws
Ow. Right in the balls.

[blakeh1]

Why do we need more of this nonsense? Is our community really THAT starved for news of anything, that we have now resorted to this? Seriously...

that's not a haiku
you have to count syllables
better luck next time

[petetsm]

Why all the nonsense?
Community starved for news,
Must we come to this?
Seriously...

Fixed that for ya ;-)

But seriously, I come to this forum for a little light distraction about my favorite wargame. This thread counts for that, more than 90% of the others. It doesnt always have to be hardcore news and spoilers.

[rydiafan]

Trolls:

Fight for a homeland.
But first, some liquid courage!
Too drunk to count syllables...

[komodokeeper]

CYGNAR:

On the battle field
Thunder of guns is just noise
Lightning does the work!

MINIONS:

Lord Carver is a Pig
with a huge-@$$ cleaver
self served pork dinner!


giving us hard mode
not counting on fingers
you must hate us all!

New Releases here,
destors and bombardiers
derailing always!

[MacNSteez]

Trolls:
Step one, pick up axe
Step two, insert in bad guy
Step three, drink some beer

[Demeritus]

Fun, this really is
A thread that should not be missed
Request: Forums Best

[Nutcase168]

Retribution

Angry Elves fight
Trying save their gods from death
Still No Destor Thanes

[Loveless]

Retribution

Angry Elves fight
Trying save their gods from death
Still No Destor Thanes

The forums cry out:
"No bombadiers or destors,
And no Bethayne, too"

[vytzka]

A few for mercenaries:

Talion pirates
will soon take all your booty
don't make this harder

you've been recruited
by Llaelese Resistance
here is your magelock*

Magnus the Traitor
is no nice sort of fellow
beware the pimp hand


*alternative bonus last line:
we have a dress code

[JoeJones]

Spend all your focus
The big man is still standing.
Orsus says, "My turn."

[themocaw]

"Just wanted to say
Epic Caine has Line of Sight."
"Good game. Play another?"

[Mod_Faultie]

Caine's Folly
He had to roll 8
Even with his ranger pal.
He hit, but didn't.

First thing her Roulette,
Quick Draw, bokur, and Vanguard
Quicken'd Ashlynn's turn.

He had his Focus,
His Feat let him blast, blast, blast.
Now skewered, Caine.

[edit] More ninja!

[PPS_Simon]

Why do we need more of this nonsense? Is our community really THAT starved for news of anything, that we have now resorted to this? Seriously...

This is a great thread
if you don't like it don't post
bans await, like frost

[Dino-Czar]

Caine's Folly
First thing her Quick Draw,
Roulette, bokur, and Vanguard
Quicken'd Ashlynn's turn.

Caine still has focus
and a Ranger to Mark you.
Finish out the turn.

edit: Ahhh! You ninja edited. Now I must amend

Caine still has focus
and a Ranger to Mark you.
He needs 6 to hit.

POW already equals ARM.
You had too much confidence
in your luck based feat.

[Ankhnatu]

Skorne:
We have poke-y ends
Yes we do. We have poke-y
ends. How about you?

[Fellio]

Thornfall:
Oink, Oink, said the pig.
Look! Bacon! said the farmers.
And then we all ate.

[luxionmk2]

This is a great thread
if you don't like it don't post
bans await, like frost

I saw what you did!
Being clever there Simon,
I would dip my paw.

[Dino-Czar]

Caine's Folly
He had to roll 8
Even with his ranger pal.
He hit, but didn't.

First thing her Roulette,
Quick Draw, bokur, and Vanguard
Quicken'd Ashlynn's turn.

He had his Focus,
His Feat let him blast, blast, blast.
Now skewered, Caine.

[edit] More ninja!

Argh! So bad, my math.
Yes Caine would lose that shoot out.
Counter-feat, bad call.

[skrob]

Legion:

Ha ha, I have stealth!
Doesn't matter. I see you.
It's called eyeless sight.

[Necra-Chi]

Legion:

Blotting out the sun
we have killed all of your dudes
while still in our base

Thagrosh is a pimp
that using his breath only,
makes baked alaska

Rules are for other
factions in warmer climate
We ignore them all

Dragons are not known
for playing with their food, so
Just Assassinate


Never thought I'd lose
My leg to a shark on land
In the winter snow

Even if you're hungry
You probably do not want
What is in this pot

[Amarel]

Interesting that
We have moved onto Casters
I choose eStryker

Overload damage
Crapola I rolled a three
I bet I'm screwed now

[Cannotcope]

Carny or the Scyth
Spiny Growth, Tenacity
Necra-chi math, wins!

Homage to the 9pt Carnivean ;-)

[PPS_Alex]

Why do we need more of this nonsense? Is our community really THAT starved for news of anything, that we have now resorted to this? Seriously...

Internet gamer
Joy blown away by fall wind
Mandolls serious

[thesavage]

Commander Stryker
Used his feat, you kill nothing.
It's my turn now *****.

Major Siege Brisbane:
Badass incarnate, big gun.
Breached the walls of Sul

The Hammersmith Jack:
Pick meanest thing on table,
Say "you are mine now!"

Sebastian Nemo:
"I created the Stormclad,
Now get off my lawn!"

[relasine]

This thread clearly belongs in Best of the Forums. (http://privateerpressforums.com/forumdisplay.php?3-Best-of-the-Forums)

[petetsm]

No no no, not right
This thread clearly belongs in
Best of the Forums (http://privateerpressforums.com/forumdisplay.php?3-Best-of-the-Forums)

also...

Old Witch watches him
Prince Vlad, hero of Khador
With the Blood Of Kings

one more...

Beast-09 may be
Sorchas bond, but gets around
A head slowly falls...

[Raktra]

For Khador:
Axe to face, axe to
Face, Axe to face, axe to face,
**** yeah, axe to face

[amphoterik]

This is a great thread
if you don't like it don't post
bans await, like frost

Simon waits in dark
The ban hammer gets us all
Eventually

(Bonus points for a 5 syllable word)

[fire4effekt]

Cygnar Trenchers

Move up and dig in.
It's all we ever do here.
Deploy the smoke shield.

Muddy holes are home
My pillow is made of stones
The Swan commands it

Weeks spent in wet graves
Khador waiting for fresh troops
Body snatching dogs.

[Raktra]

5 syllables eh?
I bet you I can top that:
Consumerism!

[fire4effekt]

Vindictus bows low
Servius is impatient
many menites lost

[amphoterik]

@Raktra

Oh Snap! When Someone
Serves you and you serve them back
it's on like King Kong

[komodokeeper]

5 syllables eh?
I bet you I can top that:
Consumerism!

Do you one better:

anti-disestab-
lishmentarianist.
now its your turn, bro! :)

[amphoterik]

Full of irony
My 5 syllable word is
monosyllabic

[komodokeeper]

hermaphroditic
many many earthworms
reproduce this way

[Raktra]

Doctor Greg House states
Many patients may contract
Sarcoidosis.

I have NO idea if I spelled that right.

[komodokeeper]

spelled correctly, one syllable short...

sar-coi-dos-is

Edited to add- ah, 1st syllable is stuck to your 2nd line. :)

[Gx1080]

This thread went right to
non-sense, land of craziness
Hippopotamus.

[fire4effekt]

two words when said quick
sound like one, please listen quick
Damage Transference


Page five speaks the truth
It's about the game you tool
So please dont be T-F-G

[thesavage]

Not original, but:

Haikus are easy,
but sometimes they don't make sense.
Refridgerator.

[Fellio]

Thread is off topic,
Back to Privateer Press now,
Thread is on Topic.

[Raktra]

spelled correctly, one syllable short...

sar-coi-dos-is

Edited to add- ah, 1st syllable is stuck to your 2nd line. :)

I've heard it in both 4 and 5 syllable formats, so I was going with the latter :)

[Top]

(Legion)

Fire and Ice on wings
The storm roars from the mountain
Raining blood and steel

[Mod_Faultie]

This is a great thread
if you don't like it don't post
bans await, like frost

Simon waits in dark
The ban hammer gets us all
Eventually
One day you can post.
But not the next. Harsh and cold:
Justice on the web.

[Shavnir]

下かんする
満月だけや
暮雪見る

[Cannotcope]

Haiku are easy
Syllables and dialects
English is too hard

[garbon]

Minions:
I'm no animal
I possess motivations
mostly my hunger

This might be my fave! Does life mimic art, or art wargames?